Tuesday, August 31, 2010

310810 - it's not the end of the world but i can see it from here

Meow meow meow meow. There's nothing to talk about. You can all go home now.

There was just a spider. On my bed. He was really, really still while I was staring at him, and I look away for ONE second and he starts running at me, practically screaming "I AM GOING TO EAT YOU". So I killed him. Necessary? Quite.
My mum used to tell me that the spider is more scared of me than I am of it. Is she insane? I am so terrified by the thought of spiders. Ooh I just had a chill.
Apparently while we sleep we swallow bugs and they crawl up our noses and things. Who the hell tells a nine year old that? I am scarred for life.

In case you haven't noticed yet, I am a little bit strange. Another little strange thing I've noticed I do, is I like to beat my search task bar. If I'm about to google something, I'll try to type it in before it's loaded the suggestions. I do that on youtube and things too.

Random question:
What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Okay I don't know what the hell kind of a question this is but it came up on google so I'm going to answer it anyway. On second thoughts, I don't have a 'secret weapon' and can't 'lure in' the same sex let alone the opposite.
Would you ever cheat on your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Kind of a stupid question, but it was the first one I saw that wasn't entirely stupid. No, I wouldn't. If you aren't happy with a person, why would you go behind their back? Just don't be with them in the first place and you can do whatever you want without being unfaithful. Easy as pie.

At the moment my solitaire statistics show:
Games played: 221
Games won: 65
Win percentage: 29%
So proud.

Monday, August 30, 2010

300810 - a little less sixteen candles, a little more touch me

Greetings. I just had cereal for dinner and it inspired me to come on here and bitch a little. I hate when people (my brother) leave that tiny little bit of cereal in the bottom of the box. Or the plastic bag in the box, same difference. There was half a bowl worth of Coco Pops left in the bag and when I tipped it out, it was mainly just dust and those little broken bits. Even worse, he's already opened the new box! WITHOUT FINISHING THE FIRST!
Hopeless, hopeless boy.
I don't know if I like my Coco Pops with or without milk better, but I know for sure that I hate the milk left in the bottom of the bowl. Apart from it looking every bit like diarrhoea (I hope I spelt that right, couldn't be bothered checking) juice, it tastes horrible. I think I prefer my chocolate milk better store-bought.

I have this sick-ass bruise on my knee that's been there for about two weeks. It's starting to fade and that makes me sad. It's actually a huge bruise surrounded by three smaller ones and they kind of all just appeared surreptitiously and they kind of hurt alot. I have learnt not to poke them.
I actually think I obtained them by sliding around the hall in my awesome new(ish) long pants which are still slightly shiney and slide further than anyone else's pants. Be jealous.

Random question:
What is the deadliest object within arms reach? Either my lava lamp which is actually a glitter lamp but it's in the same shape as a lava lamp so its the same thing or that pretty orange teapot that is in my room for no apparent reason.
Other than those, probably my Twilight book. I could just hold that up and everyone would die. It's kind of embarrassing saying that there's a Twilight book in arms reach. Actually there's two. Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. But it's okay, because there's also a Harry Potter book and one Harry Potter book out does five thousand Twilight books. I'm safe.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

290810 - for a pessamist, i'm pretty optimistic

Evening squire. I hate microwaves.
Or, more importantly, I hate the beeping noise on the microwave. I will stand in front of the microwave for however long I have the timer for and do a ninja jump to stop it exactly on one. Just to save myself from the unbearable beep. My mum gets really annoyed too, because whenever she goes to put something in the microwave the timer is on 1 second.
Another thing, I can't stand having the microwave set to an uneven number. Or rather, I can only have it on numbers ending in 5 or 0.
My microwave has a popcorn button.

Since I started using this website yesterday, I've been really obsessed with that "next blog" button. I love looking at the random blogs because some of them are really interesting, even if they are about Chinese ladies not going to church. Yes, I did follow that person. I follow a lot of people, actually, even if their whole blog is in Spanish.

Something that's been annoying me lately: opening plastic packets. Of anything. M&Ms, two minute noodles, that little vegetable sachet that comes with cup noodles (I don't actually eat the vegetables, I just pick out the carrot. It makes the noodles taste better).
Whenever I try to open M&Ms where it says "rip here", it won't rip.
Whenever I try to open two minute noodles, it tears all the way down the side and all the noodles fall out.
Whenever I try to open the vegetable sachet, it won't open and I throw it in the bin.
I can never just swallow my pride and use the scissors. There's something so degrading about that.

I very much dislike spell check. What the hell, it just told me that I spelt "was" wrong *turns off spellcheck*.

280810 - fuck armogeddon... this is hell

Well hello there, peasant. This is my blog *points to blog*. I *points to self* am Jessica. It's nice to meet you. Apparently I point alot while I talk (no, not so much online, that was just for emphasis) and I also bounce when I walk. I wear $12 rip off converse that I got from Kmart and I tie my shoelaces back to front. I live off noodles and live in my laptop. Now you know me.
Jessica likes talking in third person at times. Sometimes she imagines she has a narrator inside of her head. Jessica does believe that she will talk in third person for the rest of this post.

So, basically, Jessica posts every few days... Depending on her mood (and internet) sometimes it takes as long as 11 days (resource: http://www.firefliie.weebly.com/), sometimes if she thinks of something good to talk about, a day. Ah, screw this third person crap. It's stupid to type in unless writing a story.

I have a very short attention span and my mind tends to wander easily. I come up with these great things that I can talk about in my blog and then I forget. So I occasionally steal ideas from my friends (pfft...very occasionally).
Something Rachael said: "Why would you buy like, twenty light pink lipsticks?"
She has a point. Who's going to notice if you wear a light pink lipstick one day then a one-tone-lighter pink the next day? No one, that's who. Seriously people, It's a waste of money. But I spose, whatever floats your boat...

Anywho, this is a long enough update for now. Plus I have to stop writing because it's 11:56pm and if it goes past 12 then I'll have to change the title. Sigh. Life is so tough.