5/december - half-truism (30 days of thankful - day 07)

This morning I woke up with the burning urge to write, write, write. Unfortunately enough, I can't find my USB, but even this doesn't upset my mood.

Thirty Days of Thankful Day 07 - I am thankful for my passion to write
This may not sound like it would be something someone was thankful for, but really, writing is such an important part of my life. A lot of the time I need a bit of inspiration to push me to write, sometimes a lot of inspiration. But once I have the urge, it comes naturally. I just want it to be my life, my career. I don't think anyone will truly be able to understand how I feel about writing unless they have had the same feeling.

Tonight when I got home from work, I went into my room to grab a towel to go for a shower. Just as I was about to leave my room, I noticed that the big (recently empty) fish tank was full and there was a beautiful little fish in there! He's a black ghost knife fish, and the way he swims reminds me of a sting ray. I've decided to name him Casper, as he's very friendly and, well, a ghost fish. Get it? He hides a lot, so he hasn't really come out of his barrel since I met him. But my fighter, Quibble, seems to like him.
He looks more or less like this, but I haven't been able to get a photo of him because he's so shy.

210910 - let's hear it for rock bottom

It's almost twelve noon and I am still in bed, still in my pyjamas.

I don't know why, but whenever I think about leaving high school I think of it as all these opportunities gone. It's like I think that as soon as high school is over, everything ends, like I have to grow up and get a job and do all those adult-like things. I don't want to grow up.
I know that when you graduate it's really opportunities being opened, but when I'm this old, it just seems like everything ends as soon as I'm out of my teens.
Yeah, it does sound stupid but it makes sense in my head.
I don't have a clue what I want to do with my life. I have a vague idea of what I want to be but that doesn't say anything, it changes all the time. Just the other day I went from wanting to be a lawyer to wanting to be a teacher to wanting to work in hospitality.
Really, all I want to be is an author, but I know how hard it is to get into that and I honestly can not see myself getting published-there are so many better writers out there.
But anyway..

I think my eyes have gotten worse. They keep going blurry like they have sleep in them twenty-four seven. I probably just need new glasses but I am sick of my glasses as is. I always leave them in the bathroom accidentally and then someone goes for a shower and I'll have to wait for them to get out before my eyes stop eating themselves.
By the way, it is now 2:10 PM and I have listened to Straight To DVD soundtrack twice, taken a shower and played about seven thousand games of solitaire since I started writing this update.

I am so bored. My boyfriend went on holidays. Why does everyone have a life but me? Hey, that's okay, I'll just eat a popper with a spoon and play Sims. You guys suck.

Solitaire statistics:
Games played: 966
Games won: 395
Win percentage: 40% (oh my gosh, finally!)

Random question:
Can you make a cake?
Yes. If you give me the ingredients and instructions. It's really not that hard, I could do it on my own, but my mother insists that I am stupid and cannot work a mixer by myself.

Sorry for the lame question, I got twelve hours sleep last night and I'm still majorly tired. What is this?

140910 - you're gonna go far, kid

I just ate a really sour lolly and I almost cried. But now that all the sourness is gone it actually tastes nice *insert smile here*.

Today I took my writing book to school because I started a new story last night and was hoping to get inspiration at school (yeah, right...more like I took it so I could doodle in maths) and my friend was reading a page. I completely forgot she had it and when I looked over next another girl was reading my (semi)diary entries. I nearly died. I hate people reading my stories and what she was reading was totally embarrassing. Note to self: do not take writing book to school.

I am currently trying to learn my music piece which I have to play tomorrow (yes, I am one of those stupid kids who leaves everything 'til the last minute). My laptop is sitting on my piano and when I type it decides that it wants to hit piano buttons and starts blasting the demo music. For some reason my piano now sounds like a xylophone. I don't even feel like changing it back.

I just wrote this huge paragraph on some really deep stuff, then I thought it was too serious and deleted it all. *Hits self in head*

Solitaire statistics:
Games played: 750
Games won: 280
Win percentage: 37%

Didn't do a random question last night (I realised after I posted) so now I shall do two.
Random question(s):
If you could marry one person in the whole world, who would it be?
Alex Gaskarth. No ifs, buts or maybes. He is, without a doubt, the sexiest man alive. Oh and his band is pretty cool too.

Name someone you want to kiss.
Alex Gaskarth. No ifs, buts or maybes. He is, without a doubt, the sexiest man alive. Oh and his band is pretty cool too.

See what I did there? Yeah, sorry that was lame.

Today all through the music exam, all I could think about was playing Mario. I don't know if this is normal or not.
I may or may not have cheated on a few questions. But don't tell Rachael.


Yesterday would have been my Nana's birthday.
R.I.P. 210509.
I miss you more than anything.