The other night I couldn't fit the tomato sauce back in the fridge, so I decided to look through for out of date food to throw out. I cleared out an entire shelf of out of date mustard, olives and pickles, mayonnaise and more. Some were from 2008. I am the first person in three years to clean out our fridge.
I then went through the pantry and up until then I did not realise that noodles can even go out of date. Then I found the secret stash of noodles I had kept in my room for if we ever ran out and even though they were only a few months out of date, they tasted horrible. I had to throw out my beloved beef noodles.
A few years ago on my birthday, I got a lava lamp. But it's not like most lava lamps, filled with 'lava', it's full of glitter. Pink glitter. It's a lame version of a lava lamp, just like Edward Cullen is a lame version of a vampire.